Day 9 & 10: Unmotivated

Here is the link to my original Day 9 and Day 10 on Nutrisystem. It was the weekend of January 12-13, 2019. I was over the shock of possibly losing my job and had hope for the future. I was still dealing with plumbing issues due to the single digit winter temps. I am not looking forward to the return of winter ! 

I didn't write yesterday as I wasn't feeling it. I'm fighting the desire to put my head in the sand and not face the possibility that I won't find another job. Truth is, I don't really want to go back to work but I'm not sure that's an economically sound decision. It's disheartening to apply to so many jobs and either hear nothing or be rejected without even getting a chance to speak to the hiring team. I know I'm not alone in that - many people much younger than I are facing the same thing.

So I spent yesterday on the couch most of the day watching YouTube and playing Cookie Jam. I had a 180 calorie cinnamon roll for breakfast followed by an 80 calorie yogurt. Lunch was a 220 calorie pepperoni pizza melt with a chef salad. Afternoon snack was 80 calorie cottage cheese and 100 calorie crackers. Dinner was a 250 calorie meatloaf sandwich with a bit of bbq sauce and some green beans. Evening snack was a 140 calorie chocolate cupcake with whipped cream. I also ate the last chocolate bar that I had in the house. I'll explain the reasoning later. It was 510 calories. Ouch !

I've kept up with cleaning the litter box area every day. It's a lot easier to do when you do it this way and it's necessary since I've downsized to one box. Minnie seems to be ok with it, and that is what matters the most. I didn't really do anything else yesterday. I'm kicking myself for not mowing the lawn, since it's hotter today and rain is predicted. As for the candy bar I mentioned above, I was hungry at bedtime and thought about having a yogurt. I actually had my hand on it in the fridge, but then opted for the candy bar. This is because I'd been thinking about it for hours, thanks to a Instagram reel I saw Sunday. The guy was talking about how much you'd need to eat to gain a pound - and he had this huge stack of chocolate bars to represent that. So all I could think about was having that candy bar. I knew if I had the yogurt I'd end up having the candy bar too, so I opted to just have the candy. I saved 80 calories in spite of consuming 510. The good thing is there is no more candy in the house and I will not be buying any.

As for today, I started the day by making my bed, feeding the cats, getting my breakfast and then getting dressed. I gathered the trash in the house and got that put out, along with the recyclables. Later I cleaned up the litter area and threw a load of towels in the washer. I also took stock of what dishes I have and put what I could in the dishwasher and started that. I spent some time watching YouTube and playing Cookie Jam, but also checked in on my Chase account to ensure it had been paid (it was) and checked my bank account to ensure all was well (it was!). There is enough money left in checking to cover the National Grid and Boscov's payments, along with the September mortgage payment. I'll have to move money from my savings to cover the bills starting in September. My severance payment will take care of that, so I'm not spending my personal savings just yet.

It's just after 1 pm now and I'm going to have my yogurt and think about starting the lawn. I have all day so it's not like I have to mow nonstop. I can take all the breaks I need if it's too hot.

Breakfast today was 160 calorie waffles with low cal syrup followed by an 80 calorie yogurt much later. Lunch was a 220 calorie pepperoni pizza melt and a chef salad. Afternoon snack (at 6:30!) was 80 calorie cottage cheese (1/2 cup) and 100 calorie crackers. Dinner was a 180 calorie broccoli cheese stuffed chicken breast with brussel sprouts. Evening snack was a 140 calorie lemon zest cake.

As much as I want to put my head in the sand, I have to put in some effort on my resume from the career counselor. I reviewed it and will get on a QA call next week for that. I also scheduled a follow up call with the counselor I spoke to last week. I applied for a job with a company called Miter today. I think it would be perfect for me, so we'll see if my new and improved resume gets me an interview !

I may not be exercising right now, but I'm doing well sticking with the Nutrisystem program. I've decided to stop mentioning and beating myself up over the whipped cream. Yes, it's a few extra calories but I have to live and this is my one and only "indulgence". I will use what I use and that's that. If that is the only "extra" I allow myself each day, then I'm doing well ! As for exercise, I will keep trying. Today was very hot but that's just an excuse. I could easily have got on the treadmill, I just didn't want to.

In AT&T news, the strike goes on and according to the union bargaining updates, very little progress has been made toward an agreement.

While I was making my dinner last night I took some time to organize the freezer a little better and take stock of the Nutrisystem food I have. As always, I'm running out of breakfast items but have a ton of lunch & dinner items. Snacks will run short too. I had previously bought some waffles at Wegman's that met Nutrisystem guidelines and I can also have the Jimmy Dean Delights breakfast sandwiches. I will need produce by Friday, so I'll pick everything up then. The good news is I didn't find a ton of expired items in the freezer. I found 3 meatloaf sandwiches dated earlier this month, so that's why I had one for dinner last night. I still have a couple of flatbread pizzas which have an ok flavor but at the size of an index card, they are not very satisfying as a "dinner" item. I will eat them as a snack. I also have a couple of other pizzas which are larger, but also not very satisfying. I'd like to have all expired food gone in the next couple weeks. To that end, I took a second look tonight as I have some chicken breasts and I didn't check the dates last night. Well, good thing I did as they all expired in April, May and June. I guess I'll be having chicken for a few days ! There were 3 expired in April, 1 in May and 3 in June. I also have the 2 meatloaf sandwiches that expired a couple weeks ago, along with a couple of chicken sticks that expired in 2023. I don't even think they sell that product anymore. I'm glad to have my Nutrisystem inventory up to date. These days I only order the items that are my absolute favorites because otherwise I continually pass them by and that's how they get old.

I've mentioned before that I've thought about canceling Nutrisystem but the fact that I will never get it back at my current price is what stops me. I'm afraid that if I start cooking for myself I will tend to overeat unless I meal prep and freeze individual meals.