Day 36: Follow Your Heart (take 2)

 

Sunday September 22, 2024 

Here is the link to my original Day 36. It was  Friday February 8, 2019. My headline that day was "Follow Your Heart". It was a weigh in day and I had lost 24 pounds, so I was at 280. I weighed myself this morning and I am at 280 !!! Is this a sign ? I honestly didn't expect to see 280 this morning. I've been feeling pretty hopeless because I hadn't been able to buckle down and put in the effort required to get the weight back off. I was sabotaging myself every time I went to the grocery store. I'd tell myself I'd use moderation with things like candy and ice cream, but I know better. I've never been able to do that. I did pee a lot yesterday so I'm sure this is water loss, which is normal when you begin a diet program. The water loss gives you a little lift and helps motivate you to keep going. Past and present collided today and maybe I am once again right where I need to be. In the original blog I had decided to scale my calories back to 1200 as I felt like I was eating just to reach the calorie count, rather than because I was hungry. I'm actually sticking to 1200 right now, so I'm right in the same place. The only difference is I had not yet started exercising. Looking ahead in the old blogs, I activated the treadmill on February 10, 2019 (day 38) and I only lasted 8 minutes on my first workout, which was the Alps series with John Peel. The incline got me and I ended up trying a couple other series before I settled on a walking series with John. I did the same workout every day until it felt "easy" and then stepped up to a walking workout with Tommy Rivs, which I again did every day until it felt easy. It feels right to be working through the Road to Recovery series with Tommy, since I am working to regain my stamina and the workouts in this series get progressively longer. Not gonna lie, after working out for 62 minutes yesterday I wondered if I would "feel it" this morning. I did not ! My legs and feet and joints are fine, though my right shoulder was a little sore. That is totally unrelated to exercise as it's bothered me before. I think it's because I sleep on my right side a lot. Regardless, it's nothing that is keeping me from moving !

I was awake just before 9 today. It's another beautiful sunny day and I am loving it ! After I fed the cats, had my breakfast, got dressed and cleaned the litter boxes I sat down with a second cup of coffee and a yogurt. I was watching YouTube and playing Cookie Jam but planned on getting on the treadmill around 11.

Yesterday I (again) made a list of everything I'd like to do in a "perfect" day. I didn't check all the boxes yesterday but I'm working on being able to accept that. Every day is not going to be perfect and to be successful on this journey I have to be able to adapt to the variations in life. I can't throw my efforts to the side because I "screwed up" one day. You know what ? If I only check box, so what ? Is the world going to end ? It's just like accepting feeling hungry. Nothing bad will happen. Life is never going to be perfect and each day comes with its own unique challenges and variations. I just have to do what I can each day. So below is what I achieved today. I am focusing on what I did, not what I didn't do.

Make the bed - 

feed cats - x

have breakfast - x

clean litter boxes - x

take vitamins - x

get dressed - x

exercise - x

have morning snack - x

exercise - 

have lunch - x

exercise - 

have afternoon snack - x

have dinner - x

exercise (treadmill or Total Gym) - x

have evening snack - x

shower - 

skincare - 

brush teeth - 

Breakfast was 150 calorie pancakes with sugar free syrup. Late morning I had an 80 calorie yogurt. Morning snack was a 155 calorie vanilla shake with peanut butter powder. Lunch was a 220 calorie pepperoni pizza melt. Afternoon snack was 80 calorie cottage cheese and 110 calories peaches. Dinner was 260 calorie roasted turkey with green beans. Evening snack was 140 calorie lemon zest cake.

I woke up feeling tired but once I was up and moving that went away. I was determined to have another good day like yesterday, with some improvements. I let the latter part of the day get away from me yesterday and ran out of steam. As a result, I didn't shower as planned ! Today I will be more aware of that and make sure I get a shower in around 5 or 6. I also planned to change the sheets, to help motivate me there ! There is no way I can get in a clean bed without having showered !

By 11:17 am I had pooped 3 times and felt a little sick to my stomach. I knew darn well this was because I'd only had pancakes and coffee. I heated up the remains of my 2nd cup of coffee and had my yogurt. For flavor variation I bought a couple toasted coconut vanilla flavor. I used to have this flavor all the time but got tired of it. The yogurt settled my stomach and I resolved to be on the treadmill at noon.

I booted myself off the couch and got on the treadmill for workout #1 at about 12:10 pm. It was 15m7s with the usual 3 minute warm up and 4 minute cool down. I've adapted well to the extra minute ! After my workout I made my shake and then refilled the containers, as I finally finished the open tubs of shake mix ! I still have 4 more sets in the pantry so I'll have shake mix until February. I'd like to be back on the treadmill at 3 pm, so we'll see how that goes ! I took some of my vitamins with my shake mix and the goal for today is to finish them later ! I don't take them all at once as it's too much for my stomach to handle.

I added "clean litter boxes" to my checklist today, since I want to make that a daily occurrence. This morning I was pleased to see a large poop in the box ! I suspected Minnie was having trouble in this area, so a large poop is a great sign ! I'm trying to give her wet food whenever she seems to be hungry in hopes that she will eat less dry food, which I think contributes to not being able to poop.